"Human Behavior" On the 57th floor of a Manhattan skyscraper, KCON reporter Kylee Shepperton is representing the station at a meeting with network executives. On top of a polished, cheery wood table, she is naked and on all fours as three middle-aged men in various stages of undress from their tailored suits take turns performing sexual acts on her. The persistent, musical ringing of her cell phone interrupts them. Kylee: (Wiping her face) Excuse me for a moment, gentlemen She crawls over the end of the table where her purse is and takes out the bright pink phone. Kylee: Yes? - Dammit, Turner, now is NOT a good time - look, I'm right in the middle of something... literally - no, I do not know what's happening in Duquesa Bay, I'm on the other side of the fucking country, and unless it's a 7.0 with the epicenter in downtown Santa Conchita, I could care less... wait a minute, wait a minute, calm down - what is going on? - HOLD ON The woman glares up at the man directly in front of her. Kylee: Mr. Anderson, I can't really do that and talk on the phone at the same time, you're going to have to entertain yourself for a moment... so, Turner, you're telling me we have bodies washing up on shore, a train wreck, and oil seeping into the river in one day? - when did Satan let all Hell break loose? - what about that new reporter, I thought you were getting her to cover for me - SHE WHAT? - OH MY GOD - well, isn't that just PERFECT... give me a little longer to come to terms with the network boys, once we close the deal, I'll be on the next flight... OK, bye! Kylee sighs, puts the phone away and crawls back to her original position. Kylee: Now, where were we? Back in Santa Conchita, the blast from the exploding train and oil nearly knocks the USCG helicopter out of the sky. Anita: (Fighting for control) SON OF A... Craig: YOU GOT IT, ANITA, HOLD ON, KEEP IT STEADY Anita: (Leveling off) WHERE IN THE HELL THAT COME FROM? Craig: (Into his radio) WHO GAVE THE ORDER TO LIGHT IT? Anita: DEAR GOD, MCBRIDE WAS HEADING BACK FOR THE TRAIN WHEN IT WENT UP Craig: FORGET HER, SHE'S NOTHING MORE THAN A CINDER, WE'VE GOT TO CONCENTRATE ON GETTING THIS THING UNDER CONTROL - NOW, WHO GAVE THE GOD DAMN ORDER TO LIGHT THIS? A voice squawks through the speakers. Voice: No one gave any orders to begin the burn, Captain - it just kinda happened on its own Craig: BULLSHIT, IT DOESN'T JUST HAPPEN ON ITS OWN, SOMEONE SPARKED IT Anita: I have a bad feeling I know EXACTLY who did Craig: So HELP me, if your nature-freak brother-in-law or any of his lab buddies are involved in this... Anita: (Clenching her teeth in anger) ALETA OSCURA Craig: I think the fumes have GONE TO YOUR HEAD, LIEUTENANT Anita: At least I don't have my head up my ASS... sir Craig: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN? Anita: I said it in plain English, not Español Craig: We'll take this up again later, Fiore - right now, we need to track where the new smoke is headed, wind speed, AS WELL AS, come up with a way to protect our necks once the higher ups come looking for a scapegoat - and if you say LAYTO OSKERBA again, I will THROW you out of this chopper! Anita: Craig, save yourself the embarrassment and just call her "Darkfin" from now on Amongst the confusion on the ground, Zach stands in bewilderment, looking at where part of the bridge once was as rescue workers try to suppress the fire and tend to the injured man from the train. Gracie rushes over to him. Gracie: Where is she, Eyes, where's Morrigan? Zach does not respond. Gracie: (Shaking him) I SAID, WHERE IS SHE? - ZACH, ANSWER ME, WHERE IS SHE? Zach: (Voice wavering) I think she's dead, Gracie - I... I told her not to go back - some guy... she went... I don't... I told her... Gracie: (Crying) SHIT, SHIT SHIT SHIT, I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING Dr. Javier "Sandy" Sanchez and Dr. Shelby Willis from Santa Conchita University's biology department arrive on the scene to help coordinate the cleanup efforts. Shelby: (Checking her pager) Where in the world is Erika? - I thought for sure she'd be the first one here Javier: She's probably stuck in traffic, the 101 is completely shut down and Riverbank is a total mess Shelby: I heard from one of the firemen that some reporter got caught in the explosion Javier: Yet another tragedy, I'll be glad when this day is finally finished Shelby: (Looking out over the water) I hate to say it but this fire is a godsend Javier: (Pulling a bag of cashews out of his pocket and snacking on them) Yep, this was shaping up to be one colossal nightmare Shelby: Those government buffoons cannot be counted on to do anything right! Javier: (Looking up at Anita's helicopter) You know as well as I do how protocol bound they are, gotta get a triplicate order to use the toilet Shelby: Would you be defending them if your sister-in-law weren't one of them, Dr. Sanchez? Javier: Excellent observation, Dr. Willis! Shelby: Hmm Shelby takes some of Sandy's nuts, lays them reverently on the river's edge, chants and does a small but energetic dance. Javier: (Looking embarrassed) Is now really the right time for you to be doing your Santeria? Shelby: It's "Ocha" to me and it is indeed the right time, I am giving thanks to Olorun for preventing the death of this great river Javier: (Rolling his eyes) Ah Shelby: You have your beliefs, I have mine! Heather Raleigh, a cute, young woman with glasses and freckles bounces over to the two of them with some jars and plastic bags in her hands. Heather: Hey Sandy, I'm done collecting my samples, the others should be done soon too Javier: (Squeezing her shoulder) Thank you, Heather, you and the other students are an immense help! Heather: (Giggling) Hi, Dr. Willis, I loved your lecture in class yesterday Shelby: Really? - and what part in particular did you find most fascinating? Heather: Um... all of it was very cool! Shelby: (Sideways glance at Dr. Sanchez) Mm-hmm Heather: (Smiling coyly at Dr. Sanchez) Well, I think I'll take these back to the lab and get started on them Javier: I'll come by later to get your analysis Heather: (Leaving) Great... bye, Dr. Willis! Shelby: MM-HMM Javier: What is that tone in your voice? Shelby: I'll be glad to take a look at Ms. Raleigh's... DATA... for you - after we're through here... go home to Ona Rosa and the children! Javier: Mm-Hmm Further up the river, away from the lights and commotion, Darkfin surfaces with Morrigan in her arms and heads for the shore with Pete the Border Collie dog paddling behind them. She gently settles the reporter on the sand and takes her pulse. Darkfin: (To the dog) Look after her Darkfin holds out her left hand, crooks her index finger once and summons her trident. It flies out of a still burning patch of water and returns to her grasp. With that, she quickly dives into the murky depths and disappears as Pete begins licking Morrigan's face. Morrigan: (Drifting in an out of consciousness) Quit it, Mike... I don't feel like it right now The dog starts to bark and jump around her. Morrigan: (Fully opening her eyes) What... what happened? The big brown KCON newsvan is taking a beating as Gracie kicks the sides. Gracie: THAT NO GOOD FOR NOTHING WHORE Zach: That's not fair, Grace, we didn't have enough time to really know McBride Gracie: I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT MORRI, I'M TALKING ABOUT THAT SLUT, SHEPPERTON - SHE SHOULD'VE BEEN HERE COVERING THE STORY, NOT BLOWING THE SUITS IN NEW YORK - KYLEE SHOULD BE THE DEAD ONE RIGHT NOW - DAMN THAT BITCH TO HELL Zach: Call the station and send another team to cover for you, we both need to get out of here and clear our heads The two start to leave when Pete runs over to them. Zach: (Noticing the wet, oil-covered dog) Hey Boy, where did you come from? - come here, we'll get you some help... it's OK, c'mon The dog prances around, barking, and encourages the two to follow him. Gracie: Zach, get one of your fireman buddies to take care of the dog, I want to go home! Zach: (Chasing after Pete) I just want to see what has him all upset Gracie: (Under her breath) Maybe Timmy fell down the well again... Gracie sighs and leans her head against the side of the van. Moments later, a stunned, silent Zach rushes up to her, grabs the camerawoman's arm and drags her with him down the slope to the river's edge, where Pete stands next to Morrigan. Gracie: (Quickly covering her eyes) OH MY GOD, I DON'T WANT TO SEE HER BODY Morrigan: (Turing her head slightly) Gracie, is that you? Gracie: AAAAHHHH Takanachi goes over to McBride's side and holds her hand. Gracie: HELP, GO GET HELP, ZACH - DON'T STAND THERE GAWKING, GO The still speechless Isaacson takes off with the dog running after him. Gracie: Hey there, Morri, hold on... you're going to be just fine... Zach is going to get help, OK? - HOLD ON Morrigan: (Coughing) I don't think I'm very telegenic right now... Gracie: (Brushing some mud off of Morri's face) You look great, Sweetie, don't you worry! Morrigan: Do I have to work tomorrow? Gracie: (Laughing) I'll see what I can do Morrigan: (Starting to lose consciousness again) Gracie Gracie: Yeah? Morrigan: I... I saw the hand - I saw the hand, Gracie Gracie: What hand? - Morri... Morrigan - HURRY UP, ZACH Up in the sky, Craig and Anita continue to assess the situation. Craig: (On his radio) The fire is under control, but they want us on the ground, PRONTO Anita: They just want to parade our uniforms in front of the media and make us answer the hard questions Craig: (Rubbing his eyes) As if we haven't done that enough today Anita: What are we going to tell them? Craig: Haven't the slightest clue - I'll buy you a steak if you come up with a PLAUSIBLE explanation for the fire Anita: Sorry, I'm having pasta with the folks and you already KNOW what... or should I say WHO... I think started it Craig: (Sighing) You might as well just say god damn space aliens set it! Anita: Who knows where this creature came from, it could be... Craig: DON'T START, DON'T... YOU... START Anita mumbles something in Spanish under her breath. Craig: SPEAK ENGLISH Anita: (Half-smile) YOU... ARE... A... LIMP... DICK - is that better, Captain? Craig: At least I have one! The two glare at each other for a moment and then break out into wide grins. Craig: Let's head back to base, Lieutenant Anita: Fine, we need to refuel anyway... wait a minute - WAIT A MINUTE Craig: (Trying to see what she's seeing) What? Anita: GIMME THE INFRARED, QUICK Grabbing the goggles before the perplexed man even has a chance to hand them over, the excited woman falls silent as she focuses on the object in the river. Anita: (Slapping her thigh) LA DIABLAAAAAA HA HA HA - I SEE YOU, I SEEEEEE YOU - I KNEW IT Craig: WHAT IN THE HELL ARE YOU BLABBERING ABOUT NOW? Anita: (Calmly handing over the instrument) Take a look for yourself Craig: (Doing so) I see NOTHING but some debris and... uh... uh... oh my... Anita: TELL ME IT'S A DOLPHIN, TELL ME IT'S A DOLPHIN - GO ON, TELL ME IT'S A FUCKING DOLPHIN Craig: (Still looking at the unmistakable silhouette of Darkfin) I... um... heh, we can't say for sure exactly what it is until... OOOMPH Lieutenant Fiore sharply banks the helicopter left in a rapid descent, causing Captain Phelps' face to smash up against the glass. Craig: FIORE - THIS IS NOT AN EPISODE OF AIRWOLF Anita: (Leveling off) Sorry Craig: (Rubbing his jaw) Do you know how much these porcelain caps cost? Anita: (Still giving chase) THIS IS OUR OPPORTUNITY, CRAIG Craig: Our opportunity for what, SUICIDE? Anita: (Unbuckling herself) We can't get too close to the surface or she'll see us - once we're right on top of her, take over the controls! Craig: Whatever insanity is in your head right now, NO - AND THAT'S AN ORDER Anita takes off her shoes and watch, puts away her wallet and pulls out a double-edge combat knife. Craig: DO YOU HEAR ME? Anita: (Taking her helmet off) Not very well Craig: IT'S BEEN YEARS SINCE I'VE FLOWN SOLO Anita: (Positioning herself) I know you know how to fly this thing, you're checked out Craig: WE'RE LOW ON FUEL Anita: (Focusing on her intended target) You should have enough Craig: SHOULD? Anita: (Opening the door) Get ready, Craig Craig: This is NOT going to happen! Anita: Time to fillet a fish! Craig: FIORE, FIORE GET BACK INSIDE Looking back at her captain one last time, the woman clenches her knife tightly and dives off the helicopter. Anita: EAAAAH Craig: ANITAAAA

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Surfaced on July 1, 2000
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