Inside a suite at the Quartz Lake Inn, Kylee Shepperton finishes her morning shower and casually wraps a mauve towel around her. Checking the clock on the nightstand, she crawls over the rumpled, queen-sized bed and grabs her ringing pink cell phone.
Kylee: Hello? - oh, hi momma - no, I'm not busy, Turner just left - it's fine, really... yes, I know - the deposit should be in the bank by this afternoon, check it then - how's Step-daddy #3? - good, good... NO, I told you I do not want to discuss him EVER, do you understand that? - look, I don't care - no, he is dead to me and has been for some time... he should be dead to you, too
Three sharp knocks are heard at the door.
Kylee: Listen, a real man is here, I need to go - love you too... ENTER
Dressed in a golf sweater and wearing an impish grin, Griffin Martel does as he is told.
Griffin: Was that a request or a command?
Kylee: (Undoing the towel) Whatever makes you come quicker
The middle Martel brother chuckles and starts to undress.
Kylee: I saw your girlfriend downstairs playing chess with Big Joe
Griffin: (Going over to the bed) I don't feel like playing chess
Kylee: (Going over to Griffin) Good
Enjoying breakfast on the Quartz Lake Inn clubhouse patio, Benjamin Martel, his wife Claudia Steel and his sister Victoria Martel get ready for a round of golf.
Claudia: (Taking a sip of orange juice) UGH
Benjamin: What's wrong, Honey? - is it rancid?
Claudia: There's no vodka in here
Victoria reaches into her handbag, pulls out a silver flask and pours some of the contents into Claudia's glass.
Claudia: (Mock smile) Thanks, Sis!
Victoria: Hey, I'm just trying to up my chances on the course today
Claudia: Then you'll need to dump the whole thing in there
Benjamin: (Looking at his gold watch) None of us will have to worry about our games today if Griffin doesn't hurry up
Victoria: It's not like Griff to be late, that's usually "Brad behavior"
Benjamin: By the way, I spoke to mom last night, he's staying with her again
Victoria: (Chomping on a piece of toast) When is that woman ever going to learn?
Claudia: (Lighting up a cigarette) She should have tied her tubes after you two
Benjamin: (Kissing his wife on the cheek) That's sweet
Victoria: (Gagging on her bacon) I'll tell you one thing, I am through pulling strings for Brad at the courthouse - the next time he's in trouble, he's on his own!
Benjamin: You can tell that to mom
Staring up at the floor of private suites, Claudia shades her eyes and squints.
Claudia: Smiley, let me see your rangefinder for a moment
Reaching into his golf bag, Dr. Martel hands his wife the instrument.
Claudia: (Peering through it and smirking) Now I know why we're going to be late for our tee time
She hands it over to her husband and directs him to the appropriate window.
Benjamin: Oh wow
Victoria: What, WHAT?
Claudia: Seems your brother is getting it on with K-CUNT
Benjamin: (Still watching) It's her pet name for Kylee Shepperton
Victoria: Still threatened by her, eh Claw?
Claudia: That two-bit southern-fried whore DOES NOT threaten me - I am the most adored KCON anchorwoman in its history and one of the most respected in the western United States
Victoria: (Buttering a muffin) And that's why you run to get facelifts every other month to stay on the air
Claudia: Look, you fat cow, maybe if you put the pastries down, you'd finally get a real date instead of paying your bailiff to play handcuffs
Benjamin: (Popping a strawberry in his mouth) Ladies, ladies, please!
Claudia: It just pisses me off that Kylee uses her pussy instead of her brains to get ahead
Victoria: If I were you, I'd be more worried about that new girl, Morgan
Claudia: MCBRIDE? - please, no one can even pronounce her first name right
Victoria: She seems to be the center of attention lately
Claudia: That's just dumb luck
Victoria: Or good fortune
Claudia: (Lighting up another cigarette) She's a nice girl and does nice work but she doesn't have the ambition to sit in my anchor chair
Victoria: "Ambition" or a backstabbing, leg-spreading demeanor?
Claudia: She's not Kylee, that's for sure - she's very cute but not sexy like me or Shepperton - the network wants sex, not the girl next door... no matter how many crazy stories she stumbles upon
The clock tower chimes 8:00 am.
Claudia: DAMMIT, GRIFFIN
Victoria: (Throwing down her napkin) This blows!
Benjamin: (Still watching through the rangefinder) Literally
Claudia: (Snatching the instrument from his hands) Go on up there and tell your brother to move his ass
Benjamin: (Getting up) Literally
The only Martel daughter takes the rangefinder and starts to look as Claudia finishes the last of her orange juice.
Victoria: OH MY GOD
Claudia: Yes, Shepperton is quite the gymnast
Victoria: NO, LOOK - IN THE ROOM NEXT DOOR
Claudia: (Doing so) OOH - well, now we know how Georgie is staying in shape - that Arab man seems familiar
Victoria: He's not Arab, he's Armenian... I'm pretty sure that's Tim Hajanian from SCU
Claudia: Funny, I don't remember Greco-Roman Wrestling on the list of sports here
Victoria: Poor Lydia
Claudia: Poor Lydia? - POOR GEORGE, having to resort to balding boy toys for a little fun
Victoria: C'mon, how can you say that?
Claudia: No man wants to deal with a crippled wife
Victoria: He knew about her illness before they were married
Claudia: And she knew about him as well - she wanted a husband and a child so bad, she was willing to take on a queer
Victoria: Do you really believe that?
Claudia: It's not a belief, it's a fact - she got her "white picket fence" and he got a pretty political façade to hide behind
Victoria considers this as she drinks her coffee.
Claudia: Of course, she probably believed the "Magic Straight Fairy" would change him, make her healthy and bear them a child... instead, he humps men in park bathrooms, she hobbles around on crutches, and they end up with an adopted freak baby
Victoria: There is NOTHING wrong with Penny, she's a good, caring girl and smarter than you'll ever be
Claudia: Right, that's why she has a pierced tongue and barely passes her classes
Victoria: And your kids are doing oh-so-well
Claudia: At least I had them - what amazes me is that Lydia still has her job at the museum after the ball fiasco
Victoria: It wasn't her fault
Claudia: No, but she should've been better prepared - if it were an able-bodied person in that position, they wouldn't hesitate in showing her the door
Benjamin returns with his sheepish-looking brother in tow.
Victoria: THANK GOD, spare me from another second of Claw's conceited musings
Griffin: I apologize for being late
Claudia: Don't you mean "for being laid?"
Griffin: Good morning, Claudia, so good to see you
Benjamin: (Slinging his golf bag over his shoulder) Let's go, ladies
Inside the plush lobby of the Quartz Lake Inn, Erika engages the owner, "Big Joe" Tiszo, in a game of chess.
Joe: Your move, Vihar
Erika: (Staring out the window) Huh? - oh, right
The von Meer daughter casually moves her knight.
Joe: What concerns do you have?
Erika: What do you mean?
Joe: (Swiftly moving his piece) Checkmate
Erika: (Stunned) I didn't even see that
Joe: Obviously - there is a greater challenge going on in your mind... what has you in this altered state?
Erika: (Stirring her licorice spice tea) Nothing I can't handle
Joe: Does Griffin being here with Ms. Shepperton upset you?
Erika: (Spotting the Martels on the golf course) I didn't even know he was here... so, Riff is screwing Kylee again - I would think he'd be tired of his uncle's leftovers
Joe: (Taking a bite of his apple pancakes) Turner was just with her before Griffin arrived
Erika: (Raising an eyebrow) There's nothing like keeping the STD all in the family
Joe: Are you jealous?
Erika: Are you joking? - I am THRILLED - hopefully, he'll leave me alone now
Joe: Erika, do you really mean that?
Erika: Seriously, Joe - I do not have the time or the need for a relationship right now - Griffin has been and always will be a part of my life but not in that way
Joe: Then what has you so bothered?
Erika simply glowers at him and thinks to herself.
Joe: Or should I say whom?
Erika: Say nothing and watch me drink my tea
Joe: So, I'm right, it is a person?
Erika: Maybe... maybe more than one
Joe: Now, you are getting too kinky for me
Erika: Heh, this from a man who left the priesthood for a Parisian prostitute?
Joe: Ha, checkmate - you finally won today!
Erika: Josef... have you ever played against an opponent whose strategy and motivation were completely foreign to you and, no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't figure it out?
Joe: Hmph, I have indeed been served my badly bruised ass on a platter more than once - it is not a joyful experience
Erika: What did you do?
Erika: That was deep... and hackneyed - what did you really do?
Joe: Kicked back
Erika: TISZO, I AM GOING TO KILL YOU
Joe: Not today, you're not - you can't even beat me in chess
Erika looks down at her tea.
Joe: (Taking her hand and patting it) Look, Vihar, unless you can tell me specifics, I cannot give you any useful advice - it's not as if I can say "use this type of wrench" or "buy this brand of wine"
Erika: (Half smile) I know
Joe: You still aren't going to tell me, are you?
Erika: Thanks for listening, though - how about another game, this time I promise to concentrate
Joe: (Wiping his mouth) Sorry, I have to get ready for a fencing match later this morning - a new opponent - let's hope I can figure out her strategy and motivation quickly
Erika: (Winking) And what's your strategy and motivation, you old stud?
As the two snicker, both of them look up and notice the TV over the bar where Morrigan flashes on the screen with a typical morning news update. Erika and Joe are momentarily silenced by her image.
Joe: Ah, and there is my pretty new opponent now
Surfaced on July 1, 2000
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